top of page
Inner Counsel Psychotherapy logo

Inner Counsel Psychotherapy

Wind-shaped ripples in sand

Online therapy for perfectionism in Ontario

Perfectionism can look like high standards from the outside while feeling like constant pressure on the inside. Therapy is a place to understand where that pressure comes from and how to loosen its hold. I offer online sessions to adults across Ontario from my practice in Toronto.

Stefan Jurgens, Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying).

​Stefan Jurgens
Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying), CRPO

What perfectionism can feel like

You might be known as reliable, capable and thorough, the high achiever others count on. Underneath, nothing feels finished or good enough, and a small mistake can stay with you for days.

​

Perfectionism tends to grow from earlier experiences where approval, safety or belonging seemed to depend on getting things right. The standards that once protected you can show up today as anxiety, people-pleasing or burnout, at a cost to rest, relationships and enjoyment.

Common signs

  • Procrastinating until you can do something perfectly

  • Reworking things long after they’re good enough

  • A harsh inner critic after mistakes, big or small

  • Difficulty delegating or asking for help

  • Never feeling good enough, even after a success

  • Fear of failure, or of being found out as a fraud

How therapy for perfectionism can help

​Therapy for perfectionism is a place to explore what drives your standards and to find a way of living with more room for rest and mistakes. Forcing yourself to lower your standards rarely lasts, so we begin with what your perfectionism is protecting and what matters to you.

​

There’s no set formula. You lead and set the pace, and I respond to what you need, drawing on different approaches as they fit. Some sessions focus on practical steps, others on catching your breath, and when it feels right for you, I may offer a gentle challenge. All of my work is trauma-informed.

Where it comes from

We explore the experiences and messages that shaped your standards, and what getting it right has come to mean for you.

Getting to know the inner critic

Perfectionism comes with a demanding inner voice. We look at it with curiosity, including what it fears might happen if you eased off.

Practising good enough

When you’re ready, we can try small experiments with imperfection, like sending the email sooner or leaving a task at done, and notice what follows.

Getting started

​

bottom of page