Feeling The Heat: When Summer Feels Hard (It’s Not Just You)
- Stefan Jurgens
- Jun 27
- 3 min read
Updated: Jul 7
Summer's pressure to be endlessly joyful often clashes with reality (heat, stress, obligations), creating strain. Understand why it happens & how to honour your needs for a truly restorative season.
We talk about 'summertime' like it's all lemonade and lazy afternoons. But honestly, I'm just feeling burned out. The heat seems to amplify every little stress.
Which makes me wonder: why does the season meant to recharge us often leave us feeling drained, overwhelmed, or just ... out of sync?
The gap between summer’s bright ideal and our lived experience is both common and valid. Feeling this strain isn’t a failure—it’s an important signal deserving attention.
The Weight of Summer Expectations
A friend recently said, “I don’t have the energy to ‘summer’ this summer.” Maybe that sounds familiar to you.
Our cultural messages—from social media to advertising— encourage us to see summer as a season of nonstop fun and socializing. From first-hand experience, I know that this can foster unrealistic expectations of constant happiness, as well as a persistent pressure to stay upbeat and energetic.
That quiet pressure is often at the root of our discomfort. When your real needs—rest, relief from heat, or simply time alone—clash with the season’s unspoken script, tension builds.
The real strain comes from trying to meet expectations that were never built with our actual needs in mind.
Beneath the Sunshine: Hidden Challenges Adding to the Strain
The push to embody summer ideal feels heavier because it ignores real, everyday challenges:
The Physical Toll - Extreme heat doesn’t just cause discomfort. It drains energy, disrupts sleep, and tests patience. Prolonged exposure wears down the body and dampens mood, making simple tasks feel harder.
The Mental Load - Summer often means extra invisible work: planning vacations, juggling childcare, organizing gatherings. The effort to create “fun” can feel as exhausting as prepping for holidays.
The Social & Financial Squeeze - A full calendar can feel overwhelming when all you want is rest. Saying “no” may bring guilt or feeling out of sync. Plus, vacations, camps, and outings add real financial pressure.
These hidden challenges—fatigue, planning, costs, and social demands—can turn summer joy into a heavy expectation. Admitting we’re struggling may feel like breaking an unspoken rule about how summer “should” feel.
Recognizing where expectations collide with reality shifts the question from “What’s wrong with me?” to “What do I need?” This mindset helps us reclaim summer on our own terms.
Reclaiming Summer: Honouring Our Needs, Easing the Pressure
Feeling drained or disconnected in summer isn’t a flaw—it’s a natural response. Honouring our authentic needs isn’t weakness; it’s essential wisdom.
Instead of fighting the season or forcing yourself into a mold, you might try these intentional shifts to ease the strain and find genuine ease:
Redefine Summer Joy - Joy doesn’t require big plans or constant activity. Give yourself permission to find it in quiet moments: reading in the shade, sipping something cold, listening to crickets, or simply resting. This is real summer joy, too.
Respect Your Body’s Reality - Work with your body, not against it. Stay hydrated, use fans or AC when possible, cool your room before bed, spend time outside during cooler hours, and slow your pace. This is basic self-care.
Guard Your Energy - Your energy is precious, especially in summer. It’s not just okay—it’s necessary—to say no and make space for yourself. Real rest isn’t selfish; it’s what allows meaningful moments to happen. Protect your peace.
Finding Your Own Summer Ease
Summer doesn’t have to be picture-perfect to be meaningful. Its beauty can exist alongside real challenges.
When heat, stress, and pressure weigh you down, remember: your well-being comes first.
Honour your needs, set boundaries, embrace small joys, and move through the season with intention. That’s how you ease the burden and find your own version of summer ease.
You’re not alone … and choosing what feels real to you is a powerful act of self-care.
At Inner Counsel Therapy, I help individuals navigate the pressures of life and cultivate compassionate, realistic relationships with themselves and their expectations. Together, we explore how to embrace growth with kindness and authenticity. Book a free consultation to begin your journey toward genuine well-being.
© 2025 Stefan Jurgens. All rights reserved.
Unless otherwise noted, all content on this blog is the copyright of Stefan Jurgens.
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