Anxiety Doesn’t Have to Run Your Life: A Therapist’s Reset Plan

When My Anxiety Finally Got My Attention

Another day in my office, staring at my computer screen with a racing heart and a loud to-do list. Huge stress and anxiety as I wondered, “What if I can’t finish this project? What if I let everyone down?” What if they think I’m faking it?

Anxiety isn’t weakness—it’s a well-intentioned alarm system stuck on high alert. The good news is that our brains can learn new settings.

Understanding Your Anxiety

Our brains are wired to protect us, but sometimes this system misfires. When anxiety overstays its welcome, it often shows up in three ways:

• Constant background worry

• Physical tension (racing heart, clenched jaw)

• Avoidance of people or tasks

The good news? Like any habit, these patterns can change.

Breaking the Anxiety Cycle

Anxiety survives on sneaky loopholes and habits that feel helpful, but actually fuel the fire.

Here’s how to spot (and stop) the three common traps:

1. Quick fixes (alcohol, endless scrolling) - Temporary relief, long-term rebound

2. Avoidance - Cancelling plans feels safe but reinforces fear

3. Overworking - Burying anxiety in productivity just delays the crash

But here’s the fix. Try this instead:

• Face fears in small doses (15 minutes at the event)

• Pause before reaching for that drink/scroll (take 3 breaths first)

• Contain worry to 10-minute "scheduled" sessions

These changes can feel impossible when anxiety shouts. Here’s how to start quietly reclaiming control...

Simple Mindfulness (No Zen Required)

Calm isn't about emptying your mind—it's about anchoring in the present:

1. Ground yourself: Name 1 thing you see, 2 things you hear, 3 things you feel

2. Walk mindfully: Notice leaves moving, the air temperature, your footsteps

When to Seek Support

If anxiety:

• Disrupts sleep/work/relationships for weeks

• Feels uncontrollable

• Leads to substance reliance

... consider talking to a professional. Not because you're broken—but because everyone deserves a guide.

You’re Not Broken—You’re Human

You're not failing at being "stress-proof." You're human.

True progress isn’t a life without anxiety. It’s hearing its whispers without letting them drown out your wisdom.

A Note on Complex Anxiety

This post covers common anxiety patterns, but some experiences—like persistent panic, trauma-related symptoms, or severe impairment—need specialized care. Your healthcare team may include:

• Your family doctor (to rule out medical causes)

• A psychologist (for assessments or therapy)

• A psychiatrist (for medication evaluation if needed)

In my practice, I offer evidence-based psychotherapy for anxiety and collaborate closely with these professionals when necessary. Whether you need individual therapy, coordinated care, or both, we’ll tailor a plan to your needs.

At Inner Counsel Therapy, I help individuals to cultivate balanced, compassionate relationships with their goals and self-expectations. Together, we explore ways to embrace growth with kindness and authenticity. Book a free consultation and begin your journey back to yourself.

Photo: PC Chang via Flickr

#StressLess #AnxietyRelief #MentalHealthTips

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Unless otherwise noted, all content on this blog is the copyright of Stefan Jurgens.