Five Gentle Truths for When Life Feels Heavy — Part 1/2

Life can feel overwhelming. Maybe you have found yourself awake at 2 AM, scrolling your phone and wondering how everyone else seems to have it together. You are not broken, and you are not alone.

These five reflections are meant to steady and encourage. Read them slowly, notice what resonates, and consider one small shift you could try this week.

1. You are not lazy. You are exhausted.

Laziness suggests avoidance. Exhaustion points to overload. Calling yourself lazy adds shame to a situation that already needs care. Shame makes it harder to rest and harder to ask for help.

Try this: the next time your inner critic calls you lazy, pause. Ask, “Am I low on energy, or am I avoiding something out of fear?”

If the answer is exhaustion, treat it as information, not as failure.

2. Rest is not wasted time. It is an investment.

In cultures that prize productivity, rest can feel indulgent or even shameful. Yet research shows that adequate rest sharpens focus, creativity, and decision-making.

Think of rest as tuning an instrument. Short breaks, a full night’s sleep, or even a pause before a meeting all count. If rest feels impossible, start small.

Try a ten-minute walk, a simple breathing exercise, or closing your inbox for an hour.

3. Your worth is not conditional on output.

Many of us learn early that our value depends on achievement. This belief fuels endless striving and fragile self-esteem.

Your worth is inherent. You matter because you exist. Goals and growth are still important, but your value does not rise and fall with success or failure.

In practice, this might mean making choices that reflect who you are rather than only what you produce.

4. Boundaries are doors you control, not walls that isolate.

The word boundary often sounds like separation. In reality, boundaries protect your time, energy, and emotional space so you can show up with presence and generosity.

Clear limits make relationships sustainable. Saying no to an extra task may let you be present at home. Saying no to a friend when you are depleted may preserve the friendship in the long run.

Boundaries show that you are a person with limits, not a problem to be fixed.

5. It is not your job to set yourself on fire to keep others warm.

Compassion matters, but self-sacrifice is not always helpful. When you deplete yourself to meet the needs of others, resentment and exhaustion often follow.

True compassion includes limits. Offer warmth without burning out. This might mean lowering the intensity of your involvement, stepping back when needed, or setting clearer expectations.

You can be kind while still protecting your well-being.

A small practice for the week

Pick one reflection that stood out to you. Write it on a sticky note or set a reminder on your phone. For three days, revisit it each morning and again before bed. Notice how it influences your choices and how you speak to yourself.

Part Two will explore five more reflections about emotions, capacity, avoidance, belonging, and kinder self-talk. If these first truths resonated with you, the next set will build on them with practical steps for moving forward.

Stefan Jürgens, RP (Qualifying), is the founder of Inner Counsel Psychotherapy. He helps adults shift from inner critic to inner companion, moving away from perfectionism toward authentic self-acceptance. A free 20-minute consultation is available when you are ready to practice the kindness you offer others.

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