The Secret to Getting the Most Out of Therapy? Consistency
- Stefan Jurgens
- Dec 10, 2025
- 5 min read
Starting therapy can bring a mix of relief and hesitation. You might wonder how often to go or how long it will take before anything really changes.
Usually, it comes down to one simple but powerful thing: showing up consistently.
What My Own Therapy Taught Me About Consistency
I should tell you something first: therapists go to therapy, too.
When I first started my own therapy years ago, I treated it like a drop-in service. I’d book a session when life felt especially heavy, work through that crisis, and then disappear until the next one hit.
I wanted change, but I spent half of each session catching up and circling back to where I left off previously. It felt like climbing a hill while constantly sliding back, one step forward, two steps back.
Everything shifted once I committed to regular sessions.
For the first time, I felt like I was building something solid instead of reacting to the latest fire. That experience taught me something I now bring to every session with clients: the work gains depth when you keep showing up week after week.
Showing up consistently is more than a habit; it’s where real change begins.
Why Consistency Makes a Difference
Consistency strengthens the connection between sessions.
Each time you show up, the work from the previous session stays alive in your mind and heart. Reflections, insights, and small shifts carry over week to week, so growth builds naturally instead of being reset each time.
Therapy becomes more than a brief check-in. It becomes a space where your story can unfold, and where patterns, feelings, and challenges can be explored in depth.
Keeping a steady rhythm also helps deepen your relationship with your therapist. Trust grows with continuity, and your therapist can better hold the story of your life in mind. This allows for more meaningful conversations and insights that really stick.
When sessions are sporadic or reactive, you spend more time retracing old ground. With consistency, you spend time moving forward.
Progress becomes cumulative rather than fragmented, and the work begins to feel like a journey rather than disconnected visits.
How Consistency Makes Therapy Work for You
Consistency helps therapy build on itself. Each session becomes a continuation rather than a reset, allowing trust to grow and progress to stick.
Here is how a steady rhythm can support your work:
It builds trust and momentum
With regular sessions, you spend less energy catching up and more energy moving forward. You arrive already warmed up and connected.
Over time, trust grows from that steady familiarity, giving you space to explore parts of your life that might feel too tender or tangled to rush.
It lets the work go deeper
If you want more than just coping and hope to understand why certain patterns repeat or why some emotions hit so hard, that takes time. Regular, focused sessions give you the chance to notice progress, setbacks, and insights while they are still fresh.
Repeated reflection lets you spot patterns and try new approaches in real life.
It supports your daily life
Therapy becomes a steady anchor, a place to return each week or two to check in with yourself. That consistency can feel grounding during stressful times and helps keep self-care from sliding to the bottom of your list.
Over time, the lessons from therapy start showing up in everyday situations, making challenges more manageable.
Making the Work Stick Between Sessions
Consistency matters most when it continues between sessions. Here are some practical ways to carry the work forward:
The 5-Minute Post-Session Practice
Right after each session, jot down:
One insight that stood out
One thing you want to remember
One small action you can take this week
The Between-Sessions Check-In
A few days after your session, pause and ask yourself: What from last time am I noticing in my daily life? What do I want to remember for next time? Keep a running reminder note in your phone.
Common Hurdles and Solutions
“My schedule is chaotic.”
Pre-book 4–6 sessions at the same time each week. This keeps therapy from becoming negotiable and creates a protected window just for you.
“Therapy is an investment. I am worried about cost.”
Be upfront about your budget with your therapist. Options include alternating weekly sessions with monthly check-ins, sliding scale rates, or training clinics. Consider what sporadic crisis sessions cost over a year versus consistent, preventive work.
“The work feels uncomfortable.”
Discomfort can point to growth. Try writing down the difficult topic first, then hand it to your therapist saying, “I need to talk about this, but I don’t know how to start.”
How to Be an Active Collaborator
Starting therapy can feel uncertain, but asking a few simple questions helps you know what to expect:
What does a typical course of therapy look like?
How often do you recommend we meet initially?
How will we know if this is working?
To get the most out of therapy, I typically suggest starting with weekly sessions. This gives us time to understand what’s happening and create momentum. Later, you might transition to less frequent check-ins as things stabilize. Learn more about me and my approach.
The goal of these questions is to help you feel supported and included at every step.
Therapy can feel unpredictable, so having clear expectations gives you something steady to hold on to.
Try This: The 4-Session Experiment
Not ready to commit long-term? Try four weekly sessions, just one month.
After session four, assess: Did you notice something different by sessions 3-4 that you didn’t notice initially? Do you feel like you’re building on something, or still catching up?
This low-pressure approach gives you real data about whether consistency works for you.
Building Consistency Into Your Life
Think of therapy like strengthening a muscle: repetition matters.
Change usually happens gradually. You might only notice it when something that used to overwhelm you feels a little more manageable. Those small shifts add up.
Choose a session frequency that matches your goals. Weekly or bi-weekly sessions tend to support deeper work most effectively at the start.
It’s your journey, and the plan can evolve with you.
Making Therapy Consistency Work in Your Life
Choosing therapy is already a profound act of self-respect.
Choosing to show up consistently turns that intention into transformation. Small, regular steps carry you farther than you might expect.
Over time, consistency turns intention into real, lasting growth.
You've already taken an important step by considering how therapy could work better for you. If you're curious about what consistent, collaborative therapy might look like in your life, I'd welcome the chance to talk.
Book a free 15-minute consultation to explore whether we're a good fit, or reach out with questions—there's no pressure, just possibility.
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© 2025 Stefan Jurgens. All rights reserved.
Unless otherwise noted, all content on this blog is the copyright of Stefan Jurgens.
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